Pax: A Punch

I didn’t get the Nobel Prize, the one they gave for Peace.
By now, I should have gotten quite a handful, six at least.
My aide said I move mountains through the sheer force of my will –
and yet it seems there’s one more year I’ll have to wait until.

Of course, I am a humble man – accepting and uncritical.
That prize is focused less on peace, and more on what’s political.
I’ve settled seven wars this year (with Gaza, now it’s eight).
I shoulda won it hands down, absolutely, no debate.

I’ve ended all these wars abroad, depending how you frame it.
I stop strife overseas, while here at home I just inflame it.
I send troops into cities where I claim there’s insurrection,
but all that’s just a pretext to disrupt the next election.

I claim to be a man of peace – yet hate all who oppose me.
I know more about everything than anyone who knows me.
If peace comes to the Middle East, on high horse I’ll be ridin’.
But if things fall apart, then I’ll blame Bibi, or Joe Biden.