Trump, In Verse

To shut down U.S.A.I.D., I settled on a novel tactic:
claiming fifty…no – a hundred million spent on prophylactics.
No basis for this false, outrageous claim which (just between us) is
a staggering amount to cover all those foreign penises.

In order to establish that this spending was unjustified,
I said that Elon Musk made this discovery (quick note: he lied).
To add to the hyperbole – which I, of course, would have no qualms –
I said I knew these rubbers were inflated to be used as bombs.

It’s hard for me to keep a calm demeanor or be statesmanlike when
condoms are the subject – since we all know how much I dislike them.
Stormy said I didn’t wear one; not the last time nor the first.
(Of course, you’ve got a problem to be dealt with if that condom bursts.)

Those hundred million dollars were, instead, used to provide supplies
for hospitals in Gaza (two) – providing care, and saving lives.
What happens to those convalescing, now that I have pulled resources?
Not my problem. This makes me and Elon look like asses (horses’).